Conundrum: Phones Cause & Relieve Our Emotions

Hi all,

I've been thinking about our phones and how much of a drug they kind of are for us. And also how they cause two things:

• They make us feel better when we are down.

• They make us feel bad when we see something we wish we were/had.

It's interesting that our phones cause and relive the feelings we don't want:

• Avoiding an email from boss, go scroll social media

• Tired and overwhelmed from work, go binge on Netflix

• Don't want to answer a text, play a game instead

• Distraught over the news, go shopping to feel better

• Feeling left out of the loop on Facebook, doom scroll news to be in the know in a different way

It's a chicken and the egg situation because phones are obviously amazing technological creations and they connect us in ways we haven't before.

But we get sucked in by them.

And most of the feelings our phones give us is come down to feeling not good enough. Whether it's in work or the way we look or the amount we aren't accomplishing.

So when we don't feel good enough, we reach for the phone or another app if the phone is in our hand at that moment.

This is a buffering technique that our brains do to feel better.

The way to break out of the cycle, is to notice when we're doing it. Start noticing when you overbuy, waste time, can't stop scrolling, distract yourself, don't want to go to bed on time. Ask yourself:

Why am I reaching for my phone? What am I avoiding feeling? Is what I'm doing really going to make me feel better or just prolong my feeling bad?

And choose to do something intentionally.

Slow down and notice what you're doing. Look up from the phone, see where you are now and choose what you want to do with your time.